blognya uja (“,)

Actually, this is not an important news. Anyone who has a blog, sooner or later, the blog wiil be indexed by google. But when I saw my own blog appears for the first time…

WWWOOOOOWWWWW

There’s a strange feeling inside me, a feeling that I even can not describe it clearly (yeah, I know what you’re thinking. You must be thinking “norakkk banget”, hahaha it doesn’t matter).

After seeing it, I remember my lecturer Mr. Reza. He once told us (IR students) about his writing in the internet. He said, if we want to read it, just type his name in google or altavista. Then, a few links that consist of his writing will appear. Wew, now I can say the same thing. Well mr. Reza, if you want to read my post, just type “blognya uja” in google. Then, the first link appears, it is mine. You can read my post there.  

hehehe, sory for this unimportant post. i just wanna share my happy feeling with those who read my blog.

Life is short, once again I feel that the idiom is true. Right now, I’m in process finishing my final paper / minor thesis. If my prediction is right, just in a few months, I will finish my study in Unpad. And, what next?

It is like a flash, I can remember in detail just like it happens yesterday, the day when I came to Unpad, the day when I registered in Unpad Dipati Ukur, when I was looking for boarding house, when I was spending my first night in Jatinangor, etc. And now, I’m gonna go to the next chapter of my life (well, actually not that fast, maybe a few months later), it’s time to real life, a life that we don’t use money from our parents anymore, a life that we supposed to earn own money so that we can continue our life. Ooow my god, it comes too early, I feel that I haven’t spent enough time for fun, and now I am forced to face the real life.

But, does it mean that I suppose to spend my study time longer, of course it is not what I want. So, what is something that I am actually complaining about right now??? Actually, I am unsure too.

Maybe I just don’t feel that I’m ready enough. Maybe I’m sacred, will I have a good life, will I have a good job, will I be able to compete?

Or maybe it is just too soon to think all of it. Maybe what I need is enjoying what I have right now.

Still I’m confused.

i want to complete this post by adding a copy of portion from butterfly boucher’s song ”life is short”.

 more or less, it can represent what i feel…

When it doesn’t rain it snows
Yeah the cookie crumbles but in who’s hand?
All things said and all things done
Life is short

Oh I am young but I have aged
Waited long to seize the day
All things said and plenty done…life’s too short

Ooooh could this be….
Ooooh could this be the day I’ve waited for?

Another door to peek in through
The floor is filthy
But the couch is clean
At the end of the day
That’s another day gone
Life is short….Ooo life is short

Everyone has his/her own standard in doing something. It goes to me too. In general, there are two kind of person in looking his/her job considered as fail or success. A perfectionist and a positive guy. I’ll give an example, if there’s a job, a perfectionist guy in the beginning will decide his/her target in completing the job. Let’s say it to reach 90% of the goal. But if finally the perfectionist guy only reach 89% of the goal, he will consider him/herself fail in doing the job. But, for a positive guy, usually he/she has a target too in the beginning, let’s say it 90% too, and if he/she only get 89% of the goal, he/she will accept it as the best that he/she can do. They don’t feel that they fail. There’s nothing wrong with both of two kind of guy that I explained above, it is just a matter of perspective seeing the result. Some people like the perfectionist guy, but the others will like the positive guy better.

I think that I am a perfectionist guy. In doing something, I decide my own target, my personal target that I don’t share with my partner (if I have). This target belongs to me only, that make me the only one who bear the burden of this target. But, it is very rare in the end that I can reach my own target, in contrary, since I have to reach the target, that make me don’t enjoy the process. And in the end I am just a target oriented and I don’t feel the excitement anymore in finishing a job. you know what, there’s nothing good with it. Therefore, now, I really regret it, I want to change my point of view from now on.

 This writing is for celebrating the end of my duty as chief of social department in HIMA HI. Great thanks to all of my partner, rara, indah, oci, fetty, anki, tara, brina, felis, ranny, and ayu. You all doing great, thanks for always supporting me. I’m really sorry because I am not a really good leader for you all. In fact, I am the one who learned a lot from you. If I’m a perfectionist, I will consider myself fail, but I’m no longer that form, I really enjoy this one year and I respect every result that I, that we have achieved. Once again, thanks for you all. 

Today, about 11 am, my esia rang, it was from my friend fira. Hmm, pretty strange, fira rarely phone me, so it’s gotta be something. “halo uja uja, lagi ngapain, lagi dmana?” (good manners ), then bla3x. the point is fira was about proposing her research design (RD) exam in next monday. FYI, the requirement for following this RD exam is proposed by at least 6 people. So fira only got 5 people. Herself, fanny, yana, oi, and dewi. They needed one more so that they can propose this RD exam. They knew that I have finished my chapter 1 (this is matter that will be examined), so they asked me. Actually, I never feel that I am ready enough to be examined next week. But fira told me that if it is not next week, RD exam will be held in February. Wow, that is not my plan how I will finish my study. So I can take that reason, but actually still I can deal if my RD exam is in February. Ok, now here is the second reason. They can’t have this RD exam if I don’t join. Hmm, so this is my role. Considering the “future” of 5 friends of me, I decided to propose too, although I am not ready enough. Pretty nice of me, haha.

If this condition happens to you, what will you do? Would you do the same? What is your priority? Your will or your friend’s need. I believe in studying PPKN (wew, dunno the English word for this) in elementary school, junior and senior high school, we all learned to prioritize other’s interest (kepentingan umum) than our interest (kepentingan pribadi). But it is not that easy for some people to apply, including me. Till this time, I kinda regret my decision to be examined next week, but rice has became porridge (nasi telah menjadi bubur ), there’s nothing that I can do right now. And it is impossible for me to take my own word back. That is not masculine, haha.

I just watched a Hollywood movie just my luck in the star movie (thanks to my astro) starred by Lindsay lohan. I assumed that some of you have watched this movie too. This kind of movie that doesn’t require serious watching. I called it as pop-corn movie. This movie’s story is about the luckiest girl in new york ashley (Lindsay lohan) and the unluckiest man in new york too, Jake (Chris Pine). The story is quiet simple. It is about the luck owned by Ashley, this luck is so powerful that makes ashley’s life is so unbelievable. It seems that she can get anything in this world . example, when she comes out of her apartment, the rain sudddenly stop, so that she can get to her office easily, plus there is a dolar (dunno the value) that sticked to her shoes. What a lucky girl.

In contrary, jake is a very poor man. It is like every bad luck that everyone has is this world gathered in jake. The example of jake’s bad luck is like every slapstic comedy that you often watch. Then, by one accident, they kiss each other and apparently ashley’s luck moves to jake. Then the story goes on, ashley in the end knows how her luck disappear and the way it does. And she want to get it back. But finally she realizes that jake deserve the luck more than she does. And she is willing to give the luck to jake. Jake which finally knows about that stuff, with ashley decide to give the luck to jake’s little friend katy. Katy seems often to be bullied in her daily life. And what about jake and ashley, they feel that it is the best luck that they can be together. Typically Hollywood story, happy ending in the end (of course in the end, it will be happy starting if it appears in the beginning  ).

But, what is luck anyway? Does it really exist in this world? Have you ever felt that your life surrounded by luck that you can gain success in your life. I believe that there is no such thing. One’s success depends on his/her efforts. Only a loser that hopes that luck will come to him/her that will make him/her success without even try anything. If luck really exists in this world, so the world is really unfair.

Enough about serious mind, I want to highlight about the “luck” stuff. How interesting that you can transfer one’s luck to another by kissing him/her.By the way, if luck really exists and can be transferred to someone else, do you really want to do that considering reason like love, charity, etc. For me, I don’t think so. I am a realist. I will keep the luck with me, the best that I can do is sharing my luck, but not to give it. What about you?

Two days after I launched my blog, I got a few comments from my friends. Both from the blog and from word of mouth. Funny thing is, most of the comments is not about what I posted, but the way I posted. Yap, they asked my decision to write in english. Here is a few of them that I quote:

Agung: btw, secara keseluruhan bagus juga blog lu, tp kayanya bukan bacaan buat orang-orang yang males baca tulisan basa inggris kaya gw.

Tyo: Akan tetapi, ada baiknya anda menulis dengan dua bahasa. Itu lebih baik. Saya pribadi boleh dikatakan sulit memahami tulisan berbahasa inggris. Mesti dibaca dgn hati-hati. Takut salah terjemah dan keliru tafsirannya.

Budi: selamat juga udah launch blog baru. Is it supposed to be in English?

Ridha: pake bahasa inggris, serius lu..?

Wew, what a comment..?

To be honest, in the beginning I am not certainly sure to write in english. I feel that I am not capable enough to do that. Until I realize, that I start from the wrong direction that make me hard to write in english.

Until 1 week ago, usually when I want to write in english, I start with bahasa indonesia first, then when it is finished, I translate it to english. That is twice a work and it is not really comfortable to do. The reason behind it is a feeling in me that writing directly in english is hard to do (like I said above). What a mistake, until without any serious purpose I tried to make essay “preserving our environment” (you can read it in my blog too) directly in english. And you know what, the idea and the word is emerged instantly without any difficulties that I have assumed so long. I have to admit that my choice of vocabulary is not high level vocabulary, but I can get along with it. There’s nothing wrong with it, and the most valuable thing is I have place to learn so I can write better in the future. Writing in this blog is a fully process of learning for me, and I enjoy it.

What is the point that I want to deliver? The point is we will never know about something until we try it ourselves.

One else, if I write in bahasa indonesia, I will be confused whether to use saya, aku, atau gua. Using word “saya” seems to be too polite, “aku” is not masculine enough, and “gua” is too harsh for me. Good thing in english is there is only one substitute word, that is using I.

Finally, my so long long long process of waiting for buying a notebook is over. Just a few days ago I just bought my second notebook (I have owned a notebook before, in my first year in Unpad, then I selled it), acer aspire 4520. Here is the specification:

Platform
AMD Turion™ 64 X2 Mobile Technology TL-58 (1.9GHz, 1 MB L2 cache), supporting AMD HyperTransport® technology
NVIDIA nForce® 610M (MCP67-MV)
Memory
512MB DDR2 memory, upgradeable to 4 GB4 using two soDIMM modules (dual-channel support) –> changed to 2 GB
Display
14.1″ WXGA Acer CrystalBrite™ TFT LCD, 1280 x 800 pixel resolution
Graphics
NVIDIA® GeForce® 7000M with up to 64MB TurboCache™ (64MB of dedicated system memory)
Audio
Dolby® -certified surround sound system with two built-in Acer 3DSonic stereo speakers
Dolby® Home Theater audio enhancement featuring Dolby® Digital, Dolby® Digital Live, Dolby® Pro Logic® II, Dolby® Digital Stereo Creator, Dolby® Headphone, Dolby® Virtual Speaker technologies
S/PDIF (Sony/Philips Digital Interface) support for digital speakers
MS-Sound compatible
Built-in microphone
Storage
80GB HDD (changed to 120 GB)
Optical Media Drive
DVD-Super Multi double-layer drive
Communication
Integrated Acer Crystal Eye webcam, supporting Acer PrimaLite™ technology
WPAN: Bluetooth® 2.0+EDR (Enhanced Data Rate)
WLAN: Acer InviLink™ 802.11b/g Wi-Fi CERTIFIED® solution, supporting Acer SignalUp™ wireless technology
LAN: Gigabit Ethernet, Wake-on-LAN ready Modem: 56K ITU V.92 with PTT approval, Wake-on-Ring ready
Size & Weight
342 (W) x 247 (D) x 35/38 (H) mm
2.48 kg

But actually, I don’t feel so happy right now. It is not a feeling that I’ve imagine before to have a new notebook. The reason is this acer is not my primary choice. In the beginning, I want to buy Compaq V3660. I’ve done researched I week before and the cost was affordable for me. But, since I have to go to Jakarta for my practical work (or field trip, or practicum profession, or whatever) I can not buy it after that day. So I have to wait until I got back from the Jakarta trip.

And you know what, when I came to the same store that I asked the price 5 days before, that Compaq price rised about 64 $. The reason is, when I came to that store 5 days before, at that time there was a computer fair “Indocomtech 2007” in Jakarta. As you know that in a fair, one price can decreased, so the store treat their price same as the computer fair price. That really sicken me, because I like that Compaq notebook so much. Oh my Goooodddddd, how could this happened to me…. I made a mistake (simple plan’s song..hehe)

After organizing my broken heart (is it the right english for “menata hati yang rusak”??? whatever, as long as you know what it means), I decided to buy my second choice, Acer 4520 that I use to type this blog right now. You can see the picture on top. Because the price is quiet lower than the Compaq, so I can upgrade it. I bought the 120 Gbs hard disk version, and I add the RAM to 2 Gbs.

Do I feel happy right now, of course I am happy. But not 100% happy. The feeling is like when we pass the SPMB (sh*t, what is the english word for this), but for our second choice. The feeling is the same as that way. Glad but dissapointed.

Have read my previous blog titled “preserving our environment” yet? There’s a little story behind it, and for me it’s a quite funny story. Actually, that blog is an essay that I wrote as a requirement to apply for a crew or translator in the United Nations Framework Convention on Climate Change’s side event entitled “Solidarity Village For A Cool Planet”. Watch out, it is a UNFCCC side event, not UNFCC itself. My horrible mistake is to read the announcement too fast, that make me forget to see the detail. And, that’s it, I wrote an essay about UNFCCC for an event that supposed to be a side event for UNFCC. An event conducted by people disagree with UNFCCC. What a fool…
What can I do right now? Do I stiil feel that I will pass the qualification? Of course no. my fate……

If we talk about effort to preserve environment, than most of us will remember about joining the preserveing environment organization like Greenpece in international level, or WALHI in Indonesia. The point is we always think that the effort relates with a commitment that can be marked by joining a simbolic organization. There is nothing that really wrong with that phenomena, because it proves our commitment and determination to protect environment. But, it can become negative if we see how it affects the others think. For those who doesn’t have such a big commitment in joining a preserving environment organization, it can block his/her willing to preserve environment. What about if he /she doesn’t want to join, where he/she think it is the only way to preserve environment, than they will stop totally. That is the scariest that we can assume this time. So we have to start change that thought. There is not only one way to preserve environmet, but there is a lot, a lot, a lot of way. But, the most effecting effort that we can do is the effort in our daily life. Yes, we can protect envinronmet by doing something valuable starting from our habit.

It is a simple thing that I have just realized it about one year ago. There’s a lot of my friend joining organization like Greenpeace, WALHI, etc. Even my own brother is the founder of Jababeka Botanical Club, one kind of that organization located in Cikarang. Back then, I thought that what they did is the real effecting effort to preserve environment. Until I knew, that it is wrong, and never be right. Than, I start to change my daily habit. The worst thing that I always did in my past is throwing my trash anywhere, not in the proper place. I changed that habit, and I did it. Imagine, how such a simple thing can make our environmet better. I just realized it recently, and to be honest I regret it. From that simple change leads to another.

Just about a few months ago, I thought why don’t I share this goodness to another, like my friend, my family, my relatives, etc. So I start “my level two efforts in preserving environment”, that is building an awareness to the others about the goodness if we can change our habit. From that time till present, I keep reminding them, and I can not say that I have succeded. Maybe I need a few more times.